We Can't be Friends....

We can’t be Friends… I have Celiac Disease

Let me start by saying that I have AMAZING friends.  I am amazed that in my short time on Earth I have had a great experience in picking random people, finding common ground and building relationships that never fade.  Seriously, I know how to pick ‘em, and those that I pick do a great job of loving <tolerating> me.  Since August of 2012 I have been on a long journey to regain my health.  My health that likely was never where it should be. It all started with a doctor telling me “Ooooh, your eyes…. You should try a Gluten Free Diet… Yeah, you should definitely do that”, handed me a referral to a dietician (if this person could actually be classified as a dietician) who told me what local restaurants had “Gluten Free stuff”.    Fast forward two years and I have had my gallbladder removed, been diagnosed with Celiac Disease and am uncovering more and more things about myself that aren’t just right.  No more bread and pasta to organ removal and the cellular health of a geriatric patient.   And I’m taking everyone around me down with me!

                 

         What does this have to do with my sweet friends?  We are Southern. We eat. We eat by ourselves. We eat together.  We use eating as an excuse to spend time together.  Our lives together revolve around food! I am certainly not complaining, because Lord knows I still LOVE to eat.  However, eating and what we eat has the very real potential to turn me into a whiny, happy then angry roller coaster She Hulk.

Portrait of me after ingesting Gluten

(close enough)

               

            Now a-days if I am feeling up to leaving the house after a long day I have to be picky about restaurants, hog all of the wait staff’s attention (sometimes even the manager) and 90% of the time turn back in to the She Hulk by the next day because many restaurants just don’t understand why I need them to get a clean spatula and why croutons can’t simply be taken off of my salad.  My She-Hulk self wants to get angry with these establishments, but in reality what I eat is in my control so I can only hold myself accountable. 

               Easiest solution for me? Avoid eating out and only eat food I have prepared for myself.  Easy enough, right?! Wrong…. Y’all, EVERYTHING revolves food.  Get togethers, celebrations, meetings, even shopping somehow comes down to food. I can’t begin to explain the panic I feel preparing myself to go into a restaurant.  Or the self-loathing reluctance I have when I have to question my own family about every ingredient and what types of cooking utensils were used. I am such a pain! And let me tell you, it’s a pain being such a pain.  I once tried to attend and just not eat.  Apparently that is rude and makes the WHOLE ROOM uncomfortable. 

                 

             A select few friends have educated themselves to the point that one might think they had just been diagnosed with Celiac disease.  But the unfortunate truth is the Celiac disease is not always easy to explain and can be even harder to understand.  I certainly do not hold it against those that love me but still really have no idea why I can’t shut up about gluten.

               

              To those that consider me a friend, please understand I am not TRYING to avoid you.  I am just having a hard time reconstructing a social life that does not revolve around food.  So, let’s just meet for coffee?  Yes, I will ask the barista at Starbucks to let me read the ingredients of the syrups and other components but I swear that will only take fifteen minutes!